society
son
At a glance
In short
Simplistically speaking, ben and bar both mean son, in two different languages: ben is the Hebrew word and bar its Aramaic equivalent, which is why the Targumim render ben as bar wherever it appears in Tanach. In Aramaic bar also means outside or separate. Rabbi Yaakov Margolis rules that a get should say ben because bar carries that double meaning, and some read in that second sense a lesson for the bar mitzvah boy.
Distinctions
Ben (בן)
The Hebrew word, and the word of Tanach. Rabbi Shlomo Pappenheim of Breslau (1740-1814) traces it, as is his way, to the two-letter root ב-ן, building and producing: children are produced from their parents' marriage. From the same root he brings binyan (building), the building materials even (stone) and teven (straw), avnayim (a birthing chair, which helps the birthing along), and binah/tevunah (understanding), which are the products of contemplation and thought. He holds that bas (daughter) is also from ב-ן and should really be spelled banas, as it is in other Semitic languages, the nun generally dropping out in the singular and returning in the plural banos.
Rabbi Eliyahu Benamozegh (Eim LaMikra to Bereishis 4:1): pal or bal means son in Assyrian and Babylonian, and the name Hevel comes from it.
Bar (בר)
The Aramaic word, at home in Aramaic texts. Wherever ben appears in Tanach the Targumim render it bar. The one apparent exception is Mishlei 31:2, a Hebrew pasuk that uses bar, and Malbim there argues that the word is Hebrew and means "choicest," not the Aramaic for son.
Bar in Aramaic also means outside or separate, in constant use in the Gemara; a baraisa is a Tannaic teaching from outside the Mishnah. Rabbi Pappenheim traces this second sense to the two-letter root ב-ר, exclusion or separation: bar is grain separated from its chaff, bor/boris is a cleaning agent used to separate and exclude filth, and bari (against shema) is a sort of certainty in which all other options have been conclusively excluded; to which Rabbi Klein adds the common bar minan, "except from us." On Rabbi Pappenheim's reading bar means son because the child was separated from his mother's person by the act of childbirth.
That double meaning is reflected in a halachic discussion.
- Rabbi Yaakov Margolis of Regensburg (1430-1501) writes in Seder HaGet that in a get one writes "so-and-so ben so-and-so" and not bar, even though the Aramaic bar is used in all other legal documents, because a get must be as clear as possible and bar carries more than one meaning.
- Rabbi Shlomo Luria (1510-1573), the Maharshal, supports the ruling for a different reason: in this context nobody would think bar means "outside," but it might be misconstrued as an acronym for ben reb, which runs against the custom of keeping honorifics out of a get.
- Rabbi Yosef Colon (1420-1480), the Maharik, contests the ruling; the Rema, Rabbi Moshe Isserles (1520-1572), who himself died on Lag B'Omer, codified it twice in his glosses to Shulchan Aruch (Even HaEzer 126:30 and 129:7).
Bat / bas (בת) and the bar mitzvah
The Aramaic for daughter is barat, but the Targumim tend to leave the Hebrew bas untranslated (Rabbi Eliyahu HaBachur, Meturgeman), so bas serves in Aramaic too; hence bas mitzvah even in an Aramaic phrase. Why is the boy a bar mitzvah rather than a ben mitzvah? Different sources offer three possible lessons the word bar may be teaching him.
- Rabbi David Ovadiah of Tiberias, a nephew of Rabbi Ovadiah Yosef, in the name of Rabbi Meir Simcha of Dvinsk (1843-1926): because bar also means outside, teaching the boy that he now stands outside, on the threshold of entering adult life, and at that fateful juncture has the capacity to decide which path he takes.
- The late Rabbi Alexander Sender Feuerstein of London: the Aramaic word conveys that he must master the whole Written Torah, mostly written in Hebrew, and also the Oral Torah, mostly written in Aramaic.
- Rabbi Meir Mintzberg, son-in-law of the late Rabbi Leib Mintzberg, the leader of the Yerushalmi "Masmidim," takes a different approach: like Rabbi Pappenheim he reads ben from building and producing, the son as the product of his parents' building and nurturing, and bar as the opposite connotation, the son as separate and independent of them, which is what the day marks, that his growth is no longer in the hands of the parents who built him up but is now his own responsibility.
Rashbi, "Rabbi Shimon" and "Rabbi Shimon ben/bar Yochai"
A question for Lag B'Omer: is Rashbi Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai or ben Yochai? Wherever the Mishnah or Gemara says plain "Rabbi Shimon," it means Rashbi. Rabbi Yehuda ben Kalonymos of Speyer, a 12th-century Tosafist, in his lexicon of the sages Yichusei Tannaim V'Amoraim: whatever Rashbi said before he was famous is ascribed to "Rabbi Shimon ben/bar Yochai" so that it is clear who said it, and what he said once he was already an important figure is attributed to "Rabbi Shimon" plain, because everyone already knew who that was.
Also discussed in
Sources
Rabbi Reuven Chaim Klein, "Boys and Bars," What's in a Word?, Ohr Somayach, 25 May 2019.
Rabbi Reuven Chaim Klein, "Boys and Bars," What's in a Word? Synonyms in the Hebrew Language (book manuscript).
Cited in the essay: Shemos 12:43 with HaKsav VeHaKabbalah; Mishlei 31:2 with Malbim; Rabbi Shlomo Pappenheim, Cheshek Shlomo s.v. בר and בן; Rabbi Yaakov Margolis, Seder HaGet; the Maharshal; the Maharik; Rema, Even HaEzer 126:30 and 129:7; Rabbi Eliyahu HaBachur, Meturgeman; Rabbi David Ovadiah, in the name of Rabbi Meir Simcha of Dvinsk; Rabbi Alexander Sender Feuerstein; Rabbi Meir Mintzberg; Rabbi Yehuda ben Kalonymos of Speyer, Yichusei Tannaim V'Amoraim; Benamozegh, Eim LaMikra to Bereishis 4:1.